Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

  • This has become our largest and most active forum because the physics GRE is just one aspect of getting accepted into a graduate physics program.
  • There are applications, personal statements, letters of recommendation, visiting schools, anxiety of waiting for acceptances, deciding between schools, finding out where others are going, etc.

Post Reply
slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:14 pm

The girlfriend is going to be moving with me, and wants to visit the cities and campuses that are soon going to be her home too. I am assuming its bad form, but the question I have is HOW frowned upon is it. In the long run would it be better she stay home and i take a lot of pictures?

MrKite
Posts: 17
Joined: Sun Feb 01, 2009 8:01 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by MrKite » Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:18 pm

slugger wrote:The girlfriend is going to be moving with me, and wants to visit the cities and campuses that are soon going to be her home too. I am assuming its bad form, but the question I have is HOW frowned upon is it. In the long run would it be better she stay home and i take a lot of pictures?
as long as they arnt paying for her ***, I dont see what the big deal is.

User avatar
PhysicsPdx
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 6:59 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by PhysicsPdx » Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:19 pm

I was with a girl when she was accepted to U.Washington's physics department. She asked if they would pay for my travel expenses as well, they did! They aren't stupid, I'm sure they understand that a significant other could undermine the investment they are making in you. They want your other half to be satisfied as well, or there goes tens of thousands of dollars they spent on you.

Besides, the worst they could do is say no, and you've already been accepted. So, ask.
Last edited by PhysicsPdx on Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

evilclaw2321
Posts: 118
Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2008 5:51 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by evilclaw2321 » Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:19 pm

Well I'm getting married soon and obviously my fiance will be moving with me but what I'm doing is not bringing him to open houses but if/when i decide on a place then i assume in the next few months we'll go back for like a weekend, check out some housing and then he can see the city. If you do bring someone they'll be on their own to explore, most universities have activites like tours and talks planned that she couldnt attend. My fiance knows he doesn't wanna just hang outby himself in a weird city for a few days and he trusts my initial judgement.

User avatar
coreycwgriffin
Posts: 249
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:28 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by coreycwgriffin » Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:20 pm

Physicists don't have girlfriends. This thread is moot.

slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Wed Mar 04, 2009 1:22 pm

Wow...that was fast guys. I guess Ill email and ask about my hotel reservations and stuff. Thanks!

isobelojalvo
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2009 2:18 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by isobelojalvo » Wed Mar 04, 2009 2:19 pm

Minnesota mentioned helping my significant other find a career in the Twin Cities.

astrofan
Posts: 140
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 12:55 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by astrofan » Wed Mar 04, 2009 2:22 pm

coreycwgriffin wrote:Physicists don't have girlfriends. This thread is moot.
Yes, we are all asexual.

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 2:23 pm

astrofan wrote:
coreycwgriffin wrote:Physicists don't have girlfriends. This thread is moot.
Yes, we are all asexual.
and i thought my thermo book was my girlfriend for this semester... god dammit

slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Wed Mar 04, 2009 2:48 pm

Helio wrote:
astrofan wrote:
coreycwgriffin wrote:Physicists don't have girlfriends. This thread is moot.
Yes, we are all asexual.
and i thought my thermo book was my girlfriend for this semester... god dammit


In all seriousness, I think my interest in science in general and physics in particular has actually really been beneficial in meeting girls and making friends. I think most people find it really intriguing to meet someone who is genuinely excited about this kind of thing, instead of just spouting frat-boy dribble and bragging about what law firm their dad is going to get them a job at after graduation. That being said, me and Sakurai's Mod QM do summer together in the Hamptons.

User avatar
coreycwgriffin
Posts: 249
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:28 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by coreycwgriffin » Wed Mar 04, 2009 2:58 pm

slugger wrote:In all seriousness, I think my interest in science in general and physics in particular has actually really been beneficial in meeting girls and making friends. I think most people find it really intriguing to meet someone who is genuinely excited about this kind of thing, instead of just spouting frat-boy dribble and bragging about what law firm their dad is going to get them a job at after graduation. That being said, me and Sakurai's Mod QM do summer together in the Hamptons.
Not when all the girls at your college ARE those rich ungrateful types.

bosem
Posts: 52
Joined: Sun Nov 05, 2006 12:07 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by bosem » Wed Mar 04, 2009 3:00 pm

Helio wrote:
astrofan wrote:
coreycwgriffin wrote:Physicists don't have girlfriends. This thread is moot.
Yes, we are all asexual.
and i thought my thermo book was my girlfriend for this semester... god dammit
I hope you are not planning to sell the thremo book, I am pretty sure it is dirty already.. :lol:

Theoretischer
Posts: 26
Joined: Sat Jan 31, 2009 5:59 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Theoretischer » Wed Mar 04, 2009 3:01 pm

.
Last edited by Theoretischer on Wed Mar 11, 2009 11:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Wed Mar 04, 2009 3:17 pm

coreycwgriffin wrote:
slugger wrote:In all seriousness, I think my interest in science in general and physics in particular has actually really been beneficial in meeting girls and making friends. I think most people find it really intriguing to meet someone who is genuinely excited about this kind of thing, instead of just spouting frat-boy dribble and bragging about what law firm their dad is going to get them a job at after graduation. That being said, me and Sakurai's Mod QM do summer together in the Hamptons.
Not when all the girls at your college ARE those rich ungrateful types.
True, I was never part of the University of California system. :twisted:

evilclaw2321
Posts: 118
Joined: Mon Dec 08, 2008 5:51 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by evilclaw2321 » Wed Mar 04, 2009 3:19 pm

Theoretischer wrote:I found I scare off people who are not in science or mathematics when conversing. I get so overwhelmingly excited when speaking that I bounce and flail my arms. Regardless, I wouldn't change a thing.

I dont think so...being a girl i find your enthusiasm a definite good quality, people who are all blah about what they do-not attractive i think.

isobelojalvo
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2009 2:18 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by isobelojalvo » Wed Mar 04, 2009 3:20 pm

slugger wrote:
coreycwgriffin wrote:
slugger wrote:In all seriousness, I think my interest in science in general and physics in particular has actually really been beneficial in meeting girls and making friends. I think most people find it really intriguing to meet someone who is genuinely excited about this kind of thing, instead of just spouting frat-boy dribble and bragging about what law firm their dad is going to get them a job at after graduation. That being said, me and Sakurai's Mod QM do summer together in the Hamptons.
Not when all the girls at your college ARE those rich ungrateful types.
True, I was never part of the University of California system. :twisted:
Funny, I've found the guys here REALLY like that sort of girl. :roll:

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 5:39 pm

isobelojalvo wrote:
slugger wrote:
coreycwgriffin wrote:In all seriousness, I think my interest in science in general and physics in particular has actually really been beneficial in meeting girls and making friends. I think most people find it really intriguing to meet someone who is genuinely excited about this kind of thing, instead of just spouting frat-boy dribble and bragging about what law firm their dad is going to get them a job at after graduation. That being said, me and Sakurai's Mod QM do summer together in the Hamptons.
Not when all the girls at your college ARE those rich ungrateful types.
True, I was never part of the University of California system. :twisted:


lets see... i am currently in LA that leaves only four schools that really known.... i am not in the ominous one that is underground (HMC) or the one that is right next to a community college (Caltech), then again i am not a US citizen so getting into the third (FUCLA) is also close to impossible, that leaves one school (the bastardization of the school should be a hint), which has EXACTLY the reputation everybody is talking about, esp. when people do not understand that i have 6 hours of lab and classes on friday that i need to go to (i know what a surprise when thermo is at 9 am)... some people can do it, but i rather sit at home doing my homework than wash down natty light/ice with popov or the other way around, while frat boys or wannabes tell me how i should tell them something in german.

slugger wrote:Funny, I've found the guys here REALLY like that sort of girl. :roll:
There are enough of those kind here... i was surprised how hypocritical people can be at times :shock: :shock:

bosem wrote: I hope you are not planning to sell the thremo book, I am pretty sure it is dirty already.. :lol:
i don't tell my physics books..they are all dirt anyway. :lol: :shock: :lol:

User avatar
coreycwgriffin
Posts: 249
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:28 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by coreycwgriffin » Wed Mar 04, 2009 5:45 pm

Helio wrote:...i rather sit at home doing my homework than wash down natty light/ice with popov or the other way around, while frat boys or wannabes tell me how i should tell them something in german.
Are you sure you don't go to my college in New York? All the trust fund kiddies from Maine/Vermont/New Hampshire/Massachusetts/Connecticut come here, it seems, then spend their time hiking and drinking 30 racks of *** beer and huckin' the 'bee on the quad.

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 5:46 pm

coreycwgriffin wrote:
Helio wrote:...i rather sit at home doing my homework than wash down natty light/ice with popov or the other way around, while frat boys or wannabes tell me how i should tell them something in german.
Are you sure you don't go to my college in New York? All the trust fund kiddies from Maine/Vermont/New Hampshire/Massachusetts/Connecticut come here, it seems, then spend their time hiking and drinking 30 racks of *** beer and huckin' the 'bee on the quad.

LOL no I go to the school with all the OC and rich HK kids... so much fun... they aren't trust fund babies... they are just plain rich... ohh yeah two Bentley's and a lambo on campus owned by students

User avatar
coreycwgriffin
Posts: 249
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:28 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by coreycwgriffin » Wed Mar 04, 2009 5:50 pm

Helio wrote: ohh yeah two Bentley's and a lambo on campus owned by students
Wow...we don't have that. Just a lot of SAABs and Audis and Volvos.

And my brilliant 1995 Ford Aerostar, rofl.

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 7:04 pm

coreycwgriffin wrote:
Helio wrote: ohh yeah two Bentley's and a lambo on campus owned by students
Wow...we don't have that. Just a lot of SAABs and Audis and Volvos.

And my brilliant 1995 Ford Aerostar, rofl.

we have a lot of Benz and BMWs too... and i don't even own a car cause i can't afford it... so i am stuck on campus anyway

slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Wed Mar 04, 2009 9:25 pm

Wow. This got bitter fast. To fan the flames, those A-hole rich kids will wind up being your boss. My last boss failed out of college before his old man made up a job title and gave him 10 or 12 subordinates.

And my old ride was a silver 93 mercury sable wagon. It had a rear-facing 3rd row seat (remember from childhood, the "way-back" seat). Oh and it had bad brakes too. I wrapped it around a tree.

cato88
Posts: 420
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:46 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by cato88 » Wed Mar 04, 2009 9:41 pm

Slugger's right its very likely that they will be your boss (the power of networking) even if you work in academia.

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 10:00 pm

how i thank my dad for being well networked... he already got a job offer from one of his former bosses for me and that out of nowhere :lol: :lol:
cato88 wrote:Slugger's right its very likely that they will be your boss (the power of networking) even if you work in academia.

it is called the power of the frat

cato88
Posts: 420
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:46 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by cato88 » Wed Mar 04, 2009 10:55 pm

I know USC has alot of frats but clearly the being rich/networking part goes before the frat part because joining frats is a selective process with a legacy system.

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 10:59 pm

cato88 wrote:I know USC has alot of frats but clearly the being rich/networking part goes before the frat part because joining frats is a selective process with a legacy system.
you would be surprised... i know people who join or want to join frats just for the networking... i am just saying when i look at stats like 75% (or something like that) of US CEOs were frat members

cato88
Posts: 420
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:46 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by cato88 » Wed Mar 04, 2009 11:08 pm

yes there are people that want to join frats for the networking. There are people that want to go to Harvard for networking. All frats are not equal in terms of networking opportunities and not everyone can be in the frat of their choice There is a legacy system at both but obviously legacy is even more important for frats. Therefore having the networking base from being socially-economically connected helps a whole lot for joining a frat. That same base probably would work after college. Just by joining a frat does not mean youre going to have the same access to the networking base as those who had it to begin with (joining a frat with Rockefeller doesnt mean you will be as connected as a Rockefeller). In the 75% statistic may look alarming but it doesnt prove causality.

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Wed Mar 04, 2009 11:12 pm

cato88 wrote:yes there are people that want to join frats for the networking. There are people that want to go to Harvard for networking. All frats are not equal in terms of networking opportunities and not everyone can be in the frat of their choice There is a legacy system at both but obviously legacy is even more important for frats. Therefore having the networking base from being socially-economically connected helps a whole lot for joining a frat. That same base probably would work after college. Just by joining a frat does not mean youre going to have the same access to the networking base as those who had it to begin with (joining a frat with Rockefeller doesnt mean you will be as connected as a Rockefeller). In the 75% statistic may look alarming but it doesnt prove causality.
it depends on the school... a school like harvard, yale, etc. do not need the frats for networking. i know it does not prove causality, it just shows that there might be a relationship

cato88
Posts: 420
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:46 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by cato88 » Wed Mar 04, 2009 11:50 pm

You were referring to CEO's so I thought top schools were appropriate because they have a un-proportional representation in CEO's. I do not have any qualms about their being a relationship I just think that a whole lot of that relationship is probably due to the fact that a decent amount of frat members already had a networking base before they became frat members ie. they are legacies/social-economically connected.
Your networking mileage varies at top schools too. Their is a difference in networking base between a Harvard Frat/Rowing member and the average Harvard. Just because you went to Harvard as an undergrad does not mean you are friends with Rivers Cuomo.

User avatar
coreycwgriffin
Posts: 249
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:28 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by coreycwgriffin » Thu Mar 05, 2009 12:10 am

cato88 wrote:Slugger's right its very likely that they will be your boss (the power of networking) even if you work in academia.
Not buyin' this.

slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Thu Mar 05, 2009 12:38 am

It wasn't even a BS summer job at the mall...it was at a generic pharmaceutical company! The dude's dad was on the board of directors. Working outside of academia is bone-crushing, entry-level scientists are grunts.

cato88
Posts: 420
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:46 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by cato88 » Thu Mar 05, 2009 1:32 am

coreycwgriffin wrote:
cato88 wrote:Slugger's right its very likely that they will be your boss (the power of networking) even if you work in academia.
Not buyin' this.
People are human not computers. That is why networking seems to win in situations were evaluations could be vague and this include academia unless there is a PGRE equivalent for evaluating professors for tenure. If the adjunct professors son is a post doc and he is ok who do you think is getting an assistant professor position. People like to choose people they know or that look like them, it is against the spirit of a meritocracy but it is reality of human nature.

User avatar
coreycwgriffin
Posts: 249
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:28 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by coreycwgriffin » Thu Mar 05, 2009 11:33 am

cato88 wrote:
coreycwgriffin wrote:
cato88 wrote:Slugger's right its very likely that they will be your boss (the power of networking) even if you work in academia.
Not buyin' this.
People are human not computers. That is why networking seems to win in situations were evaluations could be vague and this include academia unless there is a PGRE equivalent for evaluating professors for tenure. If the adjunct professors son is a post doc and he is ok who do you think is getting an assistant professor position. People like to choose people they know or that look like them, it is against the spirit of a meritocracy but it is reality of human nature.
Obviously they've earned some credentials, though. Not the same type of people I'm talking about.

And I don't see that happening at my college.

User avatar
PhysicsPdx
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 6:59 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by PhysicsPdx » Thu Mar 05, 2009 11:35 am

How did this thread get so far off topic?

Significant others and visiting weekends, remember?

Argonic
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:57 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Argonic » Thu Mar 05, 2009 12:22 pm

I am taking my wife to all the open houses I am attending and the response varies widely. One school pays everything for her, most pay everything except for the flight, one school pays nothing.

slugger
Posts: 96
Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:12 am

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by slugger » Thu Mar 05, 2009 1:18 pm

Are you bringing her to all the physics meet-n-greets and functions also, or is she planning on sight-seeing and apartment hunting?

Argonic
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:57 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Argonic » Thu Mar 05, 2009 6:17 pm

I won't make her go to all the meet-and-greets. I will take her to some of them, such as lunches with other grad students etc. But talking to professors about their research would only bore her, so during that time she will try to get a feel for the university and the city. A lot of the places neither of us has ever been to. Sight-seeing yes, apartment-hunting not yet.

User avatar
secander2!
Posts: 264
Joined: Mon Oct 27, 2008 12:25 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by secander2! » Fri Mar 06, 2009 9:37 am

I brought my girlfriend with me to my Oxford interview, but she mostly just toured the campus while I had fun getting grilled :D

User avatar
Helio
Posts: 809
Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:11 pm

Re: Bringing Girlfriends to Open Houses

Post by Helio » Fri Mar 06, 2009 2:44 pm

secander2! wrote:I brought my girlfriend with me to my Oxford interview, but she mostly just toured the campus while I had fun getting grilled :D
and afterwards she grilled you on the interview right? :lol: :lol:



Post Reply