Not sure why nobody replied, although the phrase "an end meat" is hysterically funny.
Florida is good in hep-ph, with Matchev, Sikivie, Woodard. The only hep-th person is Qiu. Seehttp://www.phys.ufl.edu/research/hep.shtml#theory
As far as the chance of becoming a professor: there were six jobs last year in the US in hep-ph/hep-th. This year seems to be better, but it's still a very small number. If you don't have a PhD from a top ten, your chances are quite small. Many jobs outside academia require either citizenship or a green card.